Eduspeak

Here are words of Psalm 23 translated into Eduspeak.

It is a laughable parody.

If you are like me, having laughed or been puzzled, you would much prefer the original King James version.

The Lord and I are in a shepherd/sheep situation and I am in a position of negative need.

He prostrates me in a green-belt grazing area.

He conducts me directionally parallel to non-torrential aqueous liquid.

He returns to original satisfaction levels my psychological make-up.

He switches me on to a positive behavioural format for maximum prestige of his identity.

It should be said that, notwithstanding the fact that I make ambulatory progress through the umbrageous interhill mortality slot, terror sensations will not be initiated within me due to

para-ethical phenomena.

Your pastoral walking aid and quadruped pick-up unit will introduce into me a pleasurific mood state.

You design and produce a nutrient-bearing, furniture-type structure in the context of non-cooperative elements.

You act out a head-related folk ritual employing vegetable extract by beverage utensil experiences  in a volume crisis

It is an on-going deductible  fact that your interrelational, emphatical and non-vengeance capabilities will retain me as their target focus for the duration of my non-death period.

And I will possess tenant rights in the housing unit of the Lord on a permanently open-ended  time basis.